Hooligan Zoo

Two Zookeepers… many Hooligans… It's always feeding time at this zoo!

When it has to be hard.

on September 8, 2016

A year and a half ago, we got a phone call from real estate agent.  She told us that since the house we were living in was for sale, she needed to show it the next day.

We hadn’t been told the house was for sale.

We had been there for seven years.

It felt like a betrayal at the time, we had thought we had a good relationship with our landlady, and the fact that she hadn’t even bothered to tell us that the house was for sale was a huge blow.

Less than six weeks later it had sold.

And we not only had a new baby placed with us, but we were soon going to be homeless.

After some significant panicking, a lot of tears, hunting on kijiji, being told no for a mortgage by every single major bank in the area (we had no credit.  Not bad credit, but no credit at all…  they would have worked with us if we had have had bad credit.), we finally found another house to rent.

It was a hard year.  A year where I felt like the Lord just wasn’t hearing me.  Where we had been pushed to the side, left in this purgatory, too far from what had been our home base for years and years, but not stable enough to create a new home base.

But then, oh then, we had the opportunity to apply for a down payment loan from the City.  I called wonderful Trudy, asked her how she felt about racing to buy a house, and she immediately said that she was all in.

The City loan is really a fantastic thing.  There are rules to follow, and it really is a first come thing.  28 people applied for 16 loans this year.  The most applicants they’ve ever had.  We were approved, and the hunting began in earnest.

Trudy drove everywhere for us.  She was a sometimes irritatingly encouraging rock of support.  When I just wanted to curl up in the corner, and resign myself to living where we were forever, she dragged me out again, always saying that this might be the one!

And then.  After a frantic couple of months, we found the house.

It was the very first house that both Jason and I loved.

It had been sitting on the market for more than a year.

It was within our price range.

We made a non-negotiable offer.  There were only two loans left for the taking at City Hall.  We needed to get an accepted conditional offer to them asap.

Waiting on the other agent was excruciating.

Then there was one loan left.

In spite of the other agent being told the urgency of the situation, our offer had still not been presented to the sellers.

And then we got the call that all the loans were gone.

We had missed out by about two hours, and now all of the loans were gone.

But the Lord, oh the Lord.  He wanted us to know that we were foolish to think we could do this without him.  He stepped in and a couple of days later we got notification that the City had FOUND MORE MONEY.

A government agency had found more money.

And it was ours.

And this house.  Oh this house.  We both fall in love with it more and more every day.  It’s the perfect balance between livable and needing some work.  Livable for me, stuff to work on for Ja.

Some days I wander around this 120 year old house, and I think about how the Lord knew, how he knew when it was built that one day we would write our story on top of the other stories already here.

There were a few other things that crazily happened that the Lord had his hands all over.  In such an obvious way.

My favourite bible verse, and one that for some reason I had forgotten through the past year of uncertainty,

When you go through deep waters,
    I will be with you.
When you go through rivers of difficulty,
    you will not drown.
When you walk through the fire of oppression,
    you will not be burned up;
    the flames will not consume you.

Isaiah 43:2

As believers, we are not promised an easy life.  We are not promised that because we believe, the Lord will wipe away all of our troubles, and make it a cake walk.  In fact, we are promised that there will be trouble.  It is going to be hard.  We will struggle.  But.  He is with us.  Always.

I needed to Be still.  I needed to know that He is God.  I needed to see Him in this.  I had forgotten, and I needed it to be hard in order to jolt us out of our complacency, to take steps, to lean on Him, and to trust Him.

That’s the hardest part of being a Christ follower for me.  The trust part.  The Being Still part.

But when we trust?  That’s when we really see Him.  That’s when we find Home.


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