Hooligan Zoo

Two Zookeepers… many Hooligans… It's always feeding time at this zoo!

I may be the worst blogger ever.

on February 9, 2011

I think back on those early days, when I rambled on about nothing in particular, just a recounting of my day, the hooligans, woes, joys, etc…

When it was such a pain in the butt to upload a picture, that posts were all text.

When my life revolved around every little tiny thing that the smallfolks did. About how they took their first step. How they said their first word. Played peek-a-boo.

It’s funny, as my baby is four now, how they’re still growing, still learning, and how I’m still growing and learning along side them. But those big milestones, they aren’t really as obvious anymore. They’re subtle. They sneak up on you.

And maybe that’s why it’s not as easy to blog anymore. Maybe those little stepping stones on the way to adulthood, the ones that are harder to point to and say, “On THAT day, he did THIS.” When it’s as simple as helping your little sister without complaining. Or asking the mama if they can do anything to help her. Or sitting down to school and focusing for longer than 15 minutes.

Those are the things that sneak up on you. That you pause, savour, and move on. Because oftentimes those moments are interspersed with the moments of fighting, of heaving great sighs of despair when being asked to do something. Of being bossy, of acting as if life is just so. very. very. hard.

But then the little moments flutter by again, and you hope, you hope that those moments will stop a while, so that you can savour them, breathe them in so deeply. And the little moments become more frequent. More special.

The hooligans, as I like to affectionately call them, are 8, 7 and 4 now. Not little babies anymore. Starting to do big things. The easy part of parenting is almost over, and we are about to embark on the heavy stuff.

The thing with parenting that I’ve come to realize is that it’s always changing. It may change on a daily basis while ministering to these wee little souls. They teach me something new every single day. They motivate me to be better, to do better. And yet, I have this fear, I have this fear that in the day to day, in the cleaning, and the wiping, and the cooking, and the teaching, I’m afraid that I’m missing it. That I will look back on this and wish I had been more present. Wish that I had more often left the laundry unfolded in the baskets, that the dishes waited just a little bit longer, that I took more time to dance around the living room.

And today, today, I promise myself and I ask the Lord to help me. To help me be here. To read, to laugh, to play. And to soak up all those things, to soak up this moment.

Around the house 001

Around the house 002

Around the house 003

Around the house 007


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