Hooligan Zoo

Two Zookeepers… many Hooligans… It's always feeding time at this zoo!

"The baby comes from WHERE?"

on September 28, 2006

Keyzia, in her non-obtrusive inquisitive way, has asked a couple of times about how the baby is going to get OUT of my tummy.  She asked Ja once, and he totally and completely wussed out and gave her some kind of “it's a lot of hard work for momma” answer.  The wuss.

Yesterday I was sewing the last of the size small cloth diaper stash, and Keyz was colouring and chatting with me.  I was only half paying attention to her, we were talking about how the baby would be coming out soon*, and we would get to hold her.

Then she springs the question on me.  “How is the baby going to get out of your tummy, momma?”

So, not believing in lying to your kids unless it's about how chocolate will make their hair turn green, or about how the double stuffed oreos are all gone, even though I'm really just saving the entire last row to eat myself…  I told her that the baby would be coming out of my vagina.

Keyzia put down her crayon and looked at me in horror.  “Your VAGINA?”  she asked.

I told her that God would make my vagina get bigger (although not nearly big enough for squeezing heads out, thank you very much), and that I would have to work very hard to get the baby out.

My daughter, my beautiful chatty intelligent four year old was rendered quite speechless.  She stared at me for a few minutes while I patiently waited for more questions.  Then she just shook her head and furiously started colouring again.

Sorry, mom, I think that the great grandkid train might have to come from someone else.


*The most DREADED question is, of course, “How did the baby get IN your tummy?”  I think daddy will be answering that one.


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