Hooligan Zoo

Two Zookeepers… many Hooligans… It's always feeding time at this zoo!

You really want it when you can't get it.

on April 11, 2006

Of course I'm talking about sleep.

Last night I finally gave up tossing and turning in bed when I peaked through my half shut eyelids and saw the clock turn to 2:11 AM. 

Up I got, stumbled downstairs, threw my beanbag heatie in the microwave, and flicked on the tube.

Did you know that Mad about You is on channel 15 at 2 in the morning?  Man, I used to love that show.  Also?  A lot of commercials for those 900 number thingies.  It's kind of bizarre, actually.  These girls who don't look older than 16 twisting and gyrating… then the weird voice overlay, “You know you want to.  Just call.  We're waiting.”  Do people really fall for that? 

So, 2 AM tv?  Seriously needs some improving.

Sleep is a funny thing.  When I am so exhausted that I feel like I can't move my limbs, it seems that sleep eludes me.  I am not a good sleeper.  I don't sleep at other people's houses… ever… and I rarely sleep through the night in my own house, with the perfect conditions, the right amount of exhaustion, etc, etc.

The more that I want sleep, the further away it goes.  Then I start to think about how tired I am, how I'm never going to get anything done the next day because I'll be so tired… how the kids are going to drive me nuts because I'm tired.  And on and on and on.

And the clock keeps ticking.

It's weird how aware I am of the time when I can't sleep.

“Oh, it's 2:00, only 4 hours and 17 minutes until the alarm goes off.”

“Look, now it's 3:15, only…”

Sleep for me is that elusive nirvana that I striving to reach.  I think that if I got one good night's sleep, it would carry me through for years.

Sleeeeeeeeep.

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